I started to wonder what I would have wanted, if I had written a post a year ago about my wishes for 2012. It's been a year that I never could have predicted but we are out the other side, and feeling positive about the year ahead. I suppose that, this time last year, I would have wanted 2012 to finally bring a diagnosis for J, to bring the end of that particular fight, and to start getting people to be less dismissive and take everything that J was having to cope with more seriously.
2012 did bring us that diagnosis, and I wrote about that year here, although not in the way that I had imagined.
So then I began to think about what I am wishing for this year. I never make resolutions (I'd rather be a bit flexible, and see what the world throws at us day by day!) So instead I'm making three wishes. My first thought was that by this time next year I would wish for J to be back in full time education. And I really do want this for him, but I know that setting deadlines for this is not necessarily helpful, as it is an incredibly slow process, and we need to expect downs as well as ups.
So my first wish for this year is that J continues to increase the amount of hours he can cope with at school, and can also start to cope with more than just one to one lessons, that he can start to be part of the school community again. Hopefully the statement process that we are in the middle of will have a positive conclusion, and support him with that.
My second is that my daughter can go to her ballet summer school this year. The world (and the Olympics) worked against us last summer, and J would not have coped with me being away for a whole week. My Mum and sister have offered to take shifts this year if needed, but the idea of me and my lovely girl having a week together in London, and for her to do what she loves - to dance - is definitely my second wish for this year.
And my third is a little one, a bit of a selfish one too. It's that my husband and I get to have an evening out together, just a couple of hours for a meal and a drink. We haven't had one in about a year and a half, so its long overdue.
So that's it really. I don't like to set unrealistic goals, or expect too much. We have learnt in this last year more than ever that life is unpredictable and doesn't always stick to the plan. But if, in a years time, we are all happy and healthy, and my three wishes have come true, then I can't ask for more than that.